May 2006

 

 

Farewell After 30 Years At Niwot Elementary 

By Mandy Sutyak

MandyS@lhvc.com  

Judy Gould, who many consider the face of Niwot Elementary School (NES), is retiring after 30 years as school secretary. Gould started working for the St. Vrain Valley School District in 1974 as a part-time clerk at Mountain View Elementary School. In 1976, she moved to NES where her children were students and where she was able to work full-time.

Gould’s mother, Margaret McCormick, was a school secretary and later a secretary to  district assistant superintendent Jack Pope. It seemed natural for Gould to apply for a job at the district. When Gould started at NES, it was a kindergarten through sixth grade school; community school hadn’t yet started. The enrollment was about 550 students, which is larger than the current enrollment. The attendance area was also much larger than it is now.

Enrollment has always been an issue. In 1992, the school went through a major remodel. The present administration wing was added and Gould got a decent office space. It also was during the 1991-92 school year that the district switched over to the middle school concept and sixth graders were moved to what is now Sunset Middle School. Gould said she missed the sound of squealing violins and squeaking clarinets from the sixth graders, but was happy that the vocal music stayed at the elementary school.

Gould recalled that there was another growth surge before Eagle Crest Elementary opened, when NES enrollment reached 780 students. There were four portables and the school had split sessions, which meant that the fourth and fifth grades went from

7:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. while kindergarten through third grade went from 9 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.

With two sets of staff and areas such as the gym continually occupied, scheduling was very difficult. Gould said that the school was fortunate to have

Connie Brodt as principal. “She was very organized, which is what it takes to run a school like that.”

is now the principal at Mead Elementary and said, “Judy Gould was my secretary and my right hand. She knew all the families in the community, along with the history of the school and local town. She was able to answer almost every question, and if she couldn’t, Jan Tornow could.” Tornow was clerk for 25 years, and Gould’s partner in the office.For Brodt, Gould was an integral part of coordinating everything at NES. Gould knew about the accounting system, bus routes, district personnel, and assisted with communications with parents and teachers.

“With her skills,” Brodt said, “she kept the school running at a smooth pace. Judy trained me to become an effective administrator due to her knowledge and commitment. “Judy has devoted her life and career to the children, families and staff at Niwot Elementary. She loved her job. She has been the lifeline to the school. She will be greatly missed to many.”

For Gould, one of the most enjoyable aspects of her career has been being around the children and watching them grow up, especially when, as high school students, they come back to do peer tutoring. She also sees children whose parents went through Niwot Elementary.

Current NES Principal Mike Keppler said, “Judy has been a tremendous resource, support system and overall superwoman for the entire school staff. She has a wonderful rapport with students, parents and members of the community. Judy cares deeply about every staff member and every student at our school. She knows who to talk to for any given situation and she deals with difficult situations in a fair and consistent manner.

“As a new principal, Judy’s caring, thoughtful approach has been an invaluable aspect of my success at this school. We will miss her for all those things she has done to help everyone feel welcome and part of the Niwot School Community. Oh, and she is an amazing secretary as well.”

Gould’s retirement plans include spending more time with her sister in Great Falls, Mont. and visiting Glacier National Park. She’s also looking forward to spending more time with her grandchildren, although she said she didn’t retire to become a babysitter.       And then with a grin, she said, “Sleeping in will be wonderful. I’ve loved it since high school!”

While she’s ready for retirement, she knows it will be very different and she will miss the staff and children. Gould said, “There has always been a great family in this building, no matter what the staff changes. It’s just a great community. Thanks for a great ride.”

 

 

Photo by Mandy Sutyak  

Judy Gould, the face of Niwot Elementary School , at work in the school office.  

Photo by Mary Wolbach Lopert  

Three generations of the Gould family participated in the May 1992 dedication ceremony for the expansion of Niwot Elementary School . Evan Gould is ringing the bell which once hung in the old Niwot Elementary School, then located in what is now the median between the north and south bound lanes of Hwy 119. Judy Gould is to the right with her nephew and Evan’s grandson, Jeff Gould, with Dave Henzel looking on.

 

 

 

 

 






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RMCC

Challenges County Commissioners’ Decision

 

By Betty Parham                                                                   

BettyP@lhvc.com  

            When the Boulder County Commissioners rejected most aspects of an application for a 132,000 square foot expansion requested by the Rocky Mountain Christian Church (RMCC) in February, no one involved with the issue really expected that it would settle the matter. Although the commissioners agreed to permit the church to replace modular classroom buildings with larger permanent buildings and also approved a small remodeling of the sanctuary, most of the proposal was rejected as an over-intensive use of the land and contrary to the Boulder County Comprehensive Plan.

            Both the church and the county now have escalated the fight to the federal court level and have set the stage for a debate on two issues. The first issue is specifically about the power local governments may or may not have over church expansion in their jurisdictions. The second issue deals with the broader concerns about religious freedom, separation of powers, the 10th amendment and the establishment clause of the first amendment.

            RMCC, which was seeking county permission to add buildings, walkways, a gymnasium, a chapel and 470 parking spaces, among other things, to their existing property at 95th Street and Niwot Road, has filed a federal lawsuit, saying the rejection of their request placed a burden on their members’ right to worship thereby violating the Religious Land Use and Institutionalized Persons Act (RLUIPA), passed by Congress in 2000. The law states that governments can’t impose a “substantial burden” on religious exercise unless there is a compelling government interest to do so.

Meanwhile, county commissioners say the expansion would be a clear violation of the county’s land use regulations and deny that their “no” vote created a “substantial burden” on the parishioners’ right to worship. They are asking for a declaration from the U.S. District Court on whether or not they violated the law under RLUIPA by rejecting the church’s application.

            Since the law is fairly new, the federal courts have not yet clarified its parameters, particularly with respect to the definition of a “substantial burden,” and the case is expected to be watched closely by church/state legal observers throughout the country. Coming into focus will be the power of local governments to decide land-use issues

            The process, could take months, if not years, to resolve.

            As it now stands, each side must file a response to the opposition’s claims before any hearings in either case can be set. The church has to respond to the county’s request for a declaratory judgment and the county is preparing a motion to dismiss the church’s lawsuit.

            The commissioners said that if the courts ultimately decreed that they violated RLUIPA they would modify their decision accordingly.

 

WHAT’S BEING SAID.... 

Pro Expansion 

“We have an active and growing sports ministry...We have devotion and Bible study at halftimes. We’re applying Christian principles to sports.... The church has the right to build on the property it has owned for two decades.” --Rich Thielen, minister of operations for RMCC  

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                “The church has suffered damages as a result of the discrimination against religious assemblies and institutions contained in the Colorado Statues and the (Boulder County Land Use) Code.”  (Colorado law does not require public and charter schools to be harmonious with the neighborhood or compatible with surrounding areas)

--Amy Nafziger, lawyer for the church, from the RMCC Complaint.  

Against Expansion: 

The church expansion would “not be in harmony with the character of the neighborhood, which is rural.” --Graham Billingsley, Boulder County Land Use director. 

“It would have meant more traffic, more pollution, more noise.... Basketball is not a religious function. This isn’t all about religious worship, but about supporting the social activities of the church.” --Neal Anderson, Niwot resident.  

“Nothing else that calls for 250,000 square feet in a rural/agricultural area would be approved...Development of this magnitude outside an urban area is detrimental.” --Commissioner Will Toor.

“RLUIPA’s reach will expand to the point where religious institutions are effectively dictating their own land-use regulations.” --David Hughes, an attorney representing the county.

“How big could this church become? One million square feet if that’s what members think they need to practice their religion? Should there be no limits?” --Commissioner Tom Mayer  

These quotes were taken from various published news reports. A spokeswoman for the church and attorneys for the parties declined to comment further for this article because of the pending litigation.          

Excerpts From the RMCC Complaint

The lawsuit filed by Rocky Mountain Christian Church against the Board of County Commissioners of Boulder County (BOCC) contains 152 paragraphs and nine separate claims. The following statements are part of RMCC's complaint:

“1. …The Church further challenges other land use regulations of Boulder County (the “County”) and actions by the BOCC and other County officials that violate both RLUIPA and the First Amendment of the United States Constitution by discriminating both against religion and between religions. …

5. Since the 1970's, religious practices in the United States and throughout the world have been characterized by the rapid growth of churches with large attendance, most often located in suburban areas of rapidly growing metropolitan areas. …

8. These large churches tend to have a conservative theology and promote intense personal commitment in a majority of their followers.

10. These large churches and the members of their congregations have come under sharp criticism from members of more traditional denominations and churches and from non-religious members of society.

15. The Census Bureau classifies the Boulder-Longmont area as a primary metropolitan statistical area (“PMSA”), and includes it within the Denver-Boulder-Greeley consolidated metropolitan statistical area (“CMSA”).

16. The Church and the Town of Niwot are a part of the urban area that constitutes the Boulder-Longmont PMSA. The large majority of the Church's congregation comes from within the Boulder-Longmont PMSA, and the Church's growth reflects the growth within the Boulder-Longmont PMSA.

26. The Church exists to be a blessing not just to its members, but also to nonmembers. This principle of evangelism is why the Church provides meeting facilities free of charge to non-profit groups in the community…

34. By 1996, the Church had constructed a church building . . . in excess of 50,000 square feet and was already serving a congregation of more than 1,700 persons…

36. In or prior to 1996, Boulder Valley Christian Church (“BVCC”) developed the first large new church in Boulder County at 68th and South Boulder Road, west of Louisville .

37. In response to the BVCC development, the County adopted Section 4-102F of the [Land Use] Code which changed the status of any church with an occupancy load of more than 100, or meeting certain other criteria, from a permitted use to a use requiring special review.

38. Since 1996, a church with an occupancy load of more than 100 cannot be developed in any zone district in the County as a use by right, meaning one that can be developed without further zoning review by the County.

39. The effect of the 1996 Code amendments was to require any but the smallest of churches to go through a discretionary review process known as special use review…

42. The unquantifiable, subjective standards set forth in Section 4-601 [criteria for special use review in the Land Use Code] allow the BOCC virtually unfettered discretion to approve or deny any application for use by special review. With respect to a proposed religious use, such subjective standards create the danger that members of the BOCC may impermissibly favor non-religious uses over religious uses, or favor one religion over another.

60. The Church's Sunday worship services are now regularly attended by over 2,100 people, approximately 30 percent of whom are children. At least 75% of the Church members live within five to seven miles of the Church in Boulder County .

61. Based on historical growth rates, the Church projects that its attendance will grow approximately three to four percent per year over the next 20 years.

65. Although the Property is designated as a “Public/Quasi-Public Facility” on the Niwot Community Service Area Map, which constitutes part of the County's Comprehensive Plan, the Revised Staff Report irrationally compared the Church Building to residences, as opposed to comparing it to Niwot High School, located only 1,400 feet from the Property, and also designated as a “Public/Quasi-Public Facility” on the Niwot Community Service Area. Map.

70. Each time the County land use staff has recommended denial of an application filed by the Church, it has focused on subjective criteria, not subject to measurement or quantification, such as “compatibility.”

79. In both the voice vote on February 2, 2006, and in the written denial, the BOCC declined to make a final decision as to whether its decision imposed a substantial hardship on the Church and the members of its congregation in their exercise of religion and directed the County attorney to file a declaratory judgment action against the Church in federal court to determine whether the decision constitutes a substantial hardship.

83. The procedures and the BOCC's duties with respect to an application for approval of a special use are set forth in Article 3 of the Code. Article 3 does not authorize or contemplate the BOCC suing an applicant in federal court.

84. In addition to being outside of its authority, the BOCC's decision to drag an applicant for a religious land use into federal court will have an unconstitutional chilling effect on all future applicants for religious land uses.

89. As a result of the Written Denial, the Church is unable to meet the religious needs of its existing congregation. Certain Church programs, such as Women in the Word, adult Sunday School, and Mothers of Preschoolers, cannot accept new participants due to lack of space. Some children's Sunday School classes must be held in hallways due to lack of space, and the Church will soon be forced to turn away children from its Sunday School program due to the space limitations of the Church Building.

105. The County's regulations governing special use review are so vague and lacking in detail that they vest unfettered discretion in the BOCC and constitute an impermissible delegation of legislative authority. For example, there is absolutely no way that any landowner or potential users of land can tell under what circumstances the BOCC will approve a non-agricultural use upon land designated as Agricultural Lands of National Significance.

111. The Colorado statutes delegating land use authority to the County, together with the Code, discriminate between religious assemblies and institutions and non-religious assemblies and institutions such as public schools and charter schools.

112. Section 22-32-124, C.R.S. (2005), exempts public schools and charter schools from the requirement of obtaining special use review from the BPCC before constructing or enlarging a facility with an occupancy load of more than 100 persons… The standards set forth for review of the location of public schools and charter … do not prohibit them from locating on lands designated as Agricultural Lands of National Significance or within buffer zones, do not require them to be harmonious with the neighborhood or compatible with surrounding areas, and do not prohibit an over-intensive use of lands.”

 

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Mill Levy Override Gets Grassroots Support

 

By Mandy Sutyak

MandyS@lhvc.com  

Longmont resident Steve Love spoke on behalf of a group of about 40 parents on April 12 when he asked the St. Vrain Valley School District Board of Education to proceed with putting a mill levy override (MLO) initiative on the ballot for the November elections.

The group believes that the 2006 election affords a greater probability of success. With a governor’s race and congressional races in 2006, a higher turnout of pro-education voters is likely, whereas the turnout in 2007 might be similar to that in 2005. Waiting until 2008 would mean an additional two years of overcrowded schools and would require further reductions to programs and services.

Love stated that having erased the deficit from the financial crisis in 2002, trust in the school board is being restored. The mill assessment for bond refunding has been decreasing and will lessen the impact of a MLO to taxpayers, Also, the mill assessment for the general fund has been declining and Referendum C will restore the Homestead Act, providing a tax break to seniors.

The 40 people represented by Love came from Erie, Firestone, Frederick, Hygiene, Longmont and Niwot. Love said that these people are not just supporters of the initiative, but individuals who are committed to working on a campaign to drive community support and success. The group hopes to expand their membership to about 200 people.

While details of the MLO were not given, the group believes the focus should be on the students more than district. Love believes the key to success is communication. “There are a lot of misconceptions about how the district gets funding. With better understanding. it would be hard for people to say to no.” Love agreed with board member Ron Schmidt that a broader base of support was important, especially from the outer perimeters of the district, which are the high growth areas. Love also said that while current efforts had been focused on garnering parental support, efforts will be made to gain the support of community leaders and local businesses.

Schmidt explained that in the district’s recent meetings with bond rating agencies the failure of previous MLO efforts had been seen as a lack of community support for the district, and this was a negative for the agencies.

Board members Schmidt, Dori Van Lone and John Caldwell pledged their support to the group, offering to help in any way they could. Caldwell said, “I can’t impress on you enough how much time, effort and commitment it will take to get this done. Don’t underestimate it.” Caldwell proposed that the group create a timeline, planning what needs to be done and then evaluating the progress at each milestone.

Board member Robert Auman raised concerns that any MLO initiative would absorb district staff time and it was not certain that staff had time available. Superintendent Dr. Randy Zila said that while a MLO does involve staff time, if the staff feels that it is good for the children then they will fully support it. Zila also said “We definitely agree there’s a need. Whether the timing is right I don’t know.”

Board President Sandi Searls was willing to bring together a group of citizens, including members from the last MLO campaign and members of this group to review the package from last year. Searls didn’t think the needs had changed.

Zila concluded the discussion stating that the board was willing to move forward with caution and wanted the group to continue with its endeavors. For more information on the parent group contact Steve Love at steve.love@usa.net. For more information on school funding please see the “Understanding School Funding” article published by the Courier in June 2005 at www.lhvc.com .

 

 

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Been Here A Long, Long Time

Niwot Businesses Reach Milestone Years

 

By Donna Currie

DonnaC@lhvc.com  

            New businesses tend to get the attention, but like those jeans that fit “just right” or those shoes that are broken in after hours of walking, long-time businesses are treasures.

            Niwot has quite a few business that have weathered the test of time. Their success should be celebrated.

 

Niwot Rental and Feed has been in business for over 25 years. Owners Steve and Kay Rollman run the store with an old-fashioned friendliness.
            Before Kay and Steve moved into their building, it was a feed store, but the Rollmans wanted to open a rental business. People still wanted feed, so the Rollmans added that as well.
            'Steve said, “We have great customers,” explaining that there have been times when customers have written their own tickets or answered the phone when it was ringing. Sometimes ve've gone the extra mile,”
            Steve said. One time, his sons helped a customer tow a horse trailer, with horse, just to lend a hand. One of the best parts of the business, according to Steve, is that “we get to work with our kids.” Son Dan is still working at the store; Tim has moved on to other ventures.

Photo by Donna Currie

   

Photo by Donna Currie

Canvasback Gallery and Framing is celebrating a 10 year anniversary, of sorts – owner Ed Mcgill has been in his current location for 10 years, although he’s been in business for 11.
            McGill said that he likes the area because it’s “more relaxed; my customers are really nice.” And he can let his dog lounge in the front yard of his business. “I just like this area,” he said.
            Besides selling artwork, McGill will frame just about anything, including needlework, canvas, shadow boxes and prints. Recently he framed a doily that had belonged to a customer’s grandmother.
            McGill started learning about framing in the 1970’s when he had an art gallery. Later, it made sense to shift his business from an art gallery to a custom frame shop. He said that for him, a service business made more sense.
           At the 300 Second Avenue building, a trio of businesses moved in when the building was new, and now they’re all celebrating ten years in Niwot.

Nancy Armstrong at 2nd Avenue Hair has been in the business for 35 years, beginning in Gunbarrel. The best thing about it is “the people – I love it. I love Niwot.” A year ago, Armstrong brought on Tom Rogers as her partner, “to share the responsibility.” She said that 2nd Avenue Hair is “a family salon” where customers can get cuts, perms, highlights and get their nails done, too.
            Styles have changed since she started in the business, with fewer shampoo-sets than when she was in beauty school. “Kids are more adventurous about color,” she added.

            Rogers enjoys the “little town feeling,” in Niwot. He said, “Niwot works so hard to be a small community, yet have the services here that we need.”
            From May 8 to 13, 2nd Avenue Hair will be celebrating its anniversary with daily giveaways, including a 27˝ television on Saturday.
          

Photo by Donna Currie

 

        

Photo by Donna Currie

 

Jan Kahl, owner of Niwot Jewelry and Gifts, grew up in the jewelry business. “My father had me selling watchbands at 14,” she said. Besides the family legacy, it’s a business she enjoys.
            “Making people happy is awesome,” Kahl said, noting that people are always excited to buy a piece of jewelry, whether it’s for themselves or for someone else.
            Kahl described Niwot as “quiet and quaint,” then added, “There’s really a lot here that people don’t know about,” including some things that people might not know about her business.
            For instance, Niwot Jewelry will repair sterling jewelry, which many other places won’t. “Gold and platinum are easier to work with,” Kahl explained, so many jewelers won’t repair sterling. Niwot Jewelry also does clock repair, including grandfather clocks, cuckoo clocks and electric models.

 

Howard Treddeda , owner of Treppeda’s Ristorante, isn’t planning any special celebrations this year, noting that his evening dining is still somewhat new and still evolving.
            “They think of it as a lunch place,” Treppeda said, noting that he draws a good business lunch crowd, while dinners aren’t as popular yet. “It’s word of mouth,” he said. “You just weather it out.”
            Treppeda said, “Food has been a part of my heritage,” and explained that everything happened in the family around “the table” and food. For dinners at his restaurant, he’d like to see it become more family oriented.
            Treppeda said that Niwot has “that old world feel. It’s quiet. I love it.” While the rest of Niwot may change, he sees the downtown area staying much as it is. “It’s not going to change on that street too much,” he said.

         

Photo by Donna Currie

 

Photo by Donna Currie

        

In Cottonwood Square , Abo’s Pizza is gearing up for a big 10-year celebration in June. Owner Tom Smathers said that there will be $10 pizzas for 10 days in June, along with $1 slices and other promotions.

            Smathers described Niwot as “as small town, right in the heart of Boulder County ,” which he said is the best of both worlds. “What a great town it is,” he said.

            Ten years ago, Smathers said that downtown was the busiest area, but over the years Cottonwood Square has become much more active. He said that 10 years ago, there were more antique stores where people would spend half the day browsing, but that profile has changed.

            Smathers said that that his business is the oldest in Cottonwood Square , and that’s not likely to change. “I’m not going anywhere,” he said.

Abo’s Pizza, 7960 Niwot Rd. 303-652-0830 .

When asked what he liked best about being in the pizza business in Niwot, Tom Smathers said, “Everything.”

 

 

 

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It’s a Laughing Matter

 

Boot Camp For The Undergrad Grad

 

By Mary Wolbach Lopert

Maryl@lhvc.com  

All right you scrubs, you neophytes, you newbies, you graduates. You think that diploma, which isn’t even in your case until you pay those library fines and settle the tab at the bookstore, is going to get you anywhere? Think again, because it won’t.

Are you LISTENING sorority girls, frat boys and jocks? This includes you GDIs, geeks, nerds and student council types who might not have spent the past four, five or six years bellying up to the keg-stand. It’s time to get a job.

You think that you can postpone the inevitable with a trip to Europe or grad school? Think again. You’re going to work. And yes, work is a four-letter word.

Do you know what that means? 

It means that Thursday night isn’t the start of yet another three-day weekend. It means that Thursday night is still a work night and you will be going to work on Friday morning and not lollygagging around nursing a hangover. There’ll be no more conversations with the great white telephone on a workday. 

Can you HEAR me?

I’m passing out your new schedule. You will memorize it and you will be tested on it.

At the top you’ll find the listings of job fairs. They run all day and it’s going to take all day to get to all those booths. Newbies, you’re going to have to miss all those soap operas and Wheel of Fortune shows you’ve been scheduling your classes around.

You’ll bring the following to said fairs: A briefcase, a pen, a résumé. And while we’re talking résumés, I want to tell you, an employer can smell one of those canned, downloaded résumés from 40 feet.

You are going to have to think for yourself. You must have done something in the five or six years you’ve just spent that will make you sound like a grownup, besides perfecting your skiing or tanning.

Dress Code: There will be no earrings for men. Women can have three ear holes at most. There will be no eye, nose or lip holes allowed.

There will be no naval sightings allowed for either men or women. There will be well-groomed hair for both sexes. Both men and women will wear a belt where applicable.

And I do not want to see any visible underwear whether it’s elastic boxer material for men or thong straps for women. And while I’m at it, thongs for shoes are unacceptable for anyone. 

Do you UNDERSTAND me, Scrubs? 

And for permanent body art, there’s tattoo make-up and if it works for Angelina Jolie, you can damn well buy it. And you had better PRAY that by the time you are 45, they’ve developed a removal system so that the Chinese symbol to ward off STDs, which you had tattooed over your butt crack/coin slot at 18, hasn’t fallen down to the back of your knees. Your mama don’t want to see that, and neither do I.

In the unlikely chance that you actually bamboozle some employer into an interview, you will appear neatly dressed and refrain from using such jargon as dude, ya, righteous, bummer and totally. I do not want to hear the word “like” used in any sentence, EVER.

In addition, you will lose the iPods, Gameboys, Play Stations, hoodies, plaid flannel PJ bottoms and crouched hats.

HAVE I made myself clear? I can’t HEAR you.

            And if you’re lucky enough to get an internship, any internship, you’ll take it, pay or no pay. And you’ll say thank you, Sir, for the opportunity, because despite what they tell you in those senior seminars, you’ll not be managing a company, a project, any staff or even yourself. You are the staff. You’ll be the one getting the coffee, doing the stapling, making the copies, moving boxes and getting bored. Got it, Gopher?

Believe it or not, your boss will know what goes on at your workstation. There will be no spider solitaire, or emailing friends on Gmail or updating your bios on Facebook. Bosses can smell those who goof off.

And for those who want to go into international business or law or banking, because you think it will involve cool travel and sipping wine along the Champs Elyse, or sake on the Ginza or viewing string bikinis in Rio, earning frequent flyer miles and first class upgrades, think again Scrub. You’re dead wrong. You WILL be sitting in some windowless cubical, in a bullpen in Fargo or Minot or Lincoln, Neb., because your company has moved its operations to the heartland to save money. You’ll be on-call 24/7 because you have to be there for clients in Moscow, Singapore, Budapest, London, New York and Honolulu.

As for those exotic meals which you thing will pad your expense account, it’ll be out of a vending machine, so make sure you have plenty of crisp dollars and don’t expect change.

There will be NO whining about your cubical. You’ll be lucky to have a cubical, especially if it’s not located down the hall, across the atrium or in a portable 1.75 miles from your actual department.

When your boss says, “how’s it going,” you WILL smile and be grateful for the opportunity to work, to pay taxes, to have your own medical insurance, to make car payments, to pay off student loans and to pay into Social Security.

This is YOUR LIFE Newbie. It’s real, it counts and it will be on your permanent record. 

Class dismissed.

 

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